2024-10-17 Enloquecido Por Tu Amor
2024-10-17 Enloquecido Por Tu Amor
Debbie Zapata
Life with Marco has been a lesson in how to live in harmony, in a state of balance between what we WANT to do, what we NEED to do and what we CAN do.
In many ways I am an extremely selfish person. I have to be in order to function. If my body says NO I have to decide whether that NO can be ignored or must be respected. Making the wrong choice can create days, weeks, or even months of agony.
When our relationship began, I was healed enough from emotional pain to be lonely and yearning for a companion. I was also recovered enough from a major health crash in 1996 to dare to believe that I could at least try to keep up with this man. We began our dance of balance from the very beginning: he sped me up, allowing me to cross thresholds I never imagined even approaching; while I slowed him down enough to appreciate the moments he was living, not just zip through them in a blur of yellow.
We both believe that we are The Perfect Couple, but if we listed our major differences on paper we would appear to be the most mismatched people on the planet. From basic things like the ideal time to eat our once a day meals (Marco in the morning, me in the late afternoon) to sleep patterns (we both wake up early but he also goes to sleep very early) we are opposites. Even to the point of Marco being the true athlete but me having the brute feet that would have saved him a lot of torture during the years we were doing our events.
We grew up in different countries. He came from a large family; mine was small. He loves to travel; I am a great tourist but travel is a horrible ordeal for me. Poor Marco, he was so excited in our early days when he talked about all the places he wanted to show me in Mexico. I warned him I was not a good traveler but he didn’t believe me just then. Eventually he learned never to talk to me on the bus, to just let me curl up with my eyes closed and suffer. We laugh now about how I have no idea what he is talking about when he mentions sight references from various trips, because HE was the only one who saw them.
Marco loves to take photos, I hate having my picture taken. He will do necessary garden work, but I am the one who truly loves to play in the dirt. He tends to prefer a more strict timetable for his days, whereas I try to ignore both clock and calendar as much as possible. Marco likes to know where we will be walking when we leave the house, I prefer the spit at the corner method of deciding where to go. Of course that was easier here in Arizona. In Mexico I did like to have a general goal in mind, such as the Botanico or the bosque at San Diego or even the Zoologico.
I very much miss our walks together. I loved heading out the door with Marco at my side and the whole day ahead of us. We had many adventures over the years: we walked along the river, we found a beautiful tree that was a lot harder to get to than we had expected, we located The Red Thing. We visited with people like El Humilde, we listened to street musicians and even chatted with one old man who was walking in Huamantla and as he got to me he shouted “WISCONSIN!” with a big grin. Turned out he had worked in that state is his youth, and seeing me must have triggered memories.
We cannot have these walks at the moment and quite honestly I would have trouble with even one of our famous Baby Walks these days, but I know that the only thing constant about Life is Change. Someday we will walk together again. The trick is simply to believe, to trust the Universe. We were united for a reason. We may be separated in body, but our spirits are joined. We are brutes in OUR sense of the word: warriors who will never give up. As long as the Universe guides us, we will follow wherever it may lead. That faith in the Universe, in our relationship, is our super power that will overcome all obstacles. We will keep moving forward in love and joy until the end of time. And beyond.
Debbie Zapata, October 2024
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